Music Videos that Contradict Lyrics

 There are several music videos that seem to have nothing to do with what the lyrics of the song are actually about.  Here are some examples:

"Who's Johnny" - El DeBarge

Song:  "I'm in love with a girl who for some unspecified reason, keeps asking who Johnny is."

Video:  "I'm being questioned in a courtroom as to the identity of Johnny, which has some unclear connection to the movie 'Short Circuit.'"

"Backstreet's Back" - Backstreet Boys

Song:  "We have returned with a song that everyone will want to dance to, and also we're all very sexy."

Video:  "We're monsters."

"Jenny" - Tommy Tutone

Song:  "I saw a sex phone number written on a wall, and I don't have the courage to call it, but I keep thinking about it."

Video:  "I'm dangerously obsessed with my crush, and somehow, my therapist got a date with her simply by calling her phone number, and then had me arrested."

"Runaway" - Bon Jovi

Song:  "Her parents didn't pay enough attention to her, so she ran away from home and fell into a life of crime."

Video:  "She was mutated by radiation, and now can incinerate people with her mind, but she can learn to control her powers through the power of dancing to Bon Jovi music."

Stop Doing This in Porno Movies

Here is my list of things that need to stop happening in porno movies:

* Shakey handheld camera!  Seriously, how hard is it to set a camera on a tripod?

* Extreme camera zooms to the point where all you can see is a blur.

* Those nonstop camera shutter noises, because one photographer is taking still images, while the other takes the video.

* Backlighting, to the point where you're almost looking at silhouettes.

* Randomly switching between a first-person view and a third-person view.  Pick one or the other, and stick with it!

* Dirty talk from people who mumble.  Learn to enunciate!  Also, it wouldn't hurt to put up some acoustic tiles in the room, or at least a few thick blankets to absorb the echo, and get a decent microphone.

* High heels on hardwood floors.  Those things are loud, and if you haven't done the afore-mentioned acoustic prep, that sound is going to be the only thing we hear.

* Hearing the camera-guy talk, especially while only using the camera microphone.  Do you have any idea how loud that is compared to everything else in the room?

* Lamp-shading.  For those unfamiliar with the term, this is when the actors/directors make it a point to show that they aren't taking the work seriously, usually as a way to deflect criticism.  Guys, it's a porno movie!  How seriously did you think people were going to take it?

* Excessive search tags.  This is not so much a problem with the creators as with the uploaders.  You can tell someone just copied and pasted a bunch of generic search terms into the tags, descriptions, and even sometimes the title.  Try to stick to what is accurate, okay?

* Surprise fetishes not mentioned in the description.  How about a little warning before you start pissing on someone?

* Switching between dom and sub roles in the same video, especially if it feels like they just forgot what they were going for.

* Those "mother-daughter" scenes where it's obvious that both actresses are the same age.  Look, I know that sometimes, it's hard to get the type of performers you want, but at least make an effort.

* Treating interracial sex as if it's supposed to be something "shocking" or "taboo."  Seriously?  It's the twenty-first century!

* Overuse of the prefix "step."  I understand the concept of the stepmother, stepsister, stepdaughter, etc., but a whole "step-family?"  Sometimes, they use terms that don't even exist, like "step-friend" or "step-neighbor."  What is that???

* Characters with no peripheral vision.  Usually, it's something like a wife cheating on her husband, who is standing in the same room, but can't see the sex going on, because he's looking slightly to the left.  What is he, one of the security guards from Metal Gear?

* That pointless pixilation on Japanese movies.  I guess it's a law or something, but it's a dumb law.

* Stalling.  Two performers awkwardly trying to pad the runtime by re-stating the same dialog, just waiting for the director to give them the signal to start fucking.  It's cringy.

* Cutting away to a completely separate, non-sexual, overly complicated subplot.  It's as if the writer wanted to be taken seriously as an artist, but couldn't get anyone to look at his script for an original mystery crime drama, so he just snuck part of it into the middle of a porno movie.  Stop doing that!  Your story sucks, but even if it didn't, this would not be the proper place for it.

(More to be added as I think of them.)

What Is A Perfect Movie Sequel?

There have been a lot of good movie sequels, and a few great movie sequels, but how many are perfect sequels?  In order to make a list, I have decided to set some rules for what constitutes a perfect sequel.  This is my list, and your opinion may differ.

1. A perfect sequel must be a "true" sequel.  This means that it cannot be a prequel, a midquel, or a remake of an existing sequel.  Otherwise, what's the point of categorizing something as a perfect sequel?  Furthermore, it must not contradict the canon of the previous movie.  "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace" doesn't count, because it's a prequel.  "The Godfather Part 2" doesn't count, because it's a mostly-prequel.  "Return to Oz" doesn't count, because it's an adaptation of a sequel to a book.  "Xanadu" doesn't count because it's a remake of a sequel to a movie unrelated to the remake.  "Son of Frankenstein" doesn't count, because it retcons major elements of the original film.

2. A perfect sequel must be the SECOND movie in the series.  There can be any number of high-quality movies which are part of an established franchise, but it takes a special talent to make a great sequel to an otherwise standalone movie.  Watching a perfect sequel should not require having seen any previous material other than the first movie.  This eliminates movies such as "Star Trek 3: The Search for Spock," "Son of Frankenstein," and "Rocky 3."  This also means that a perfect sequel cannot combine multiple storylines, being a sequel to more than one movie, such as "Frankenstein Meets the Wolfman," "Freddy vs Jason," or "Alien vs Predator."

3. A perfect sequel cannot be one story split into two parts.  The defining characteristic of any sequel is that it's a sequel, that is, a continuation of a story that otherwise would have been a complete story.  If a writer creates a script that is too long, and the studio instructs the writer to split the story into two or more parts, then the second part cannot be considered a true sequel.  "Superman" and "Superman 2," "Underworld" and "Underworld: Evolution," "Kill Bill Vol. 1" and "Kill Bill Vol. 2," and the "Lord of the Rings" Trilogy, were all written as a single story prior to being filmed and released as multiple parts, and therefore, do not qualify as perfect sequels.

4. A perfect sequel cannot end in a cliffhanger.  Any person should be able to watch parts one and two, and have seen a complete story.  A sequel cannot be a perfect sequel if the resolution to the story arc requires watching part three.  This eliminates most mid-trilogy movies such as "Back to the Future Part 2," "Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest," "The Matrix: Reloaded," "Spider-Man 2," and the afore-mentioned "Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers."

5. A perfect sequel must be of equal or greater quality to the original.  This almost goes without saying, but it the sequel is a bad movie, then it cannot be a perfect sequel.  Some examples of bad movie sequels include "Son of the Mask," "Highlander 2: The Quickening," "Beastmaster 2: Through the Portal of Time," and "Troll 2."

6. A perfect sequel must complete a story thread left unresolved in the first movie.  This is probably the most difficult criteria to meet, and eliminates most sequels.  For example, "U.S. Marshalls," "Clear and Present Danger," "Addams Family Values," "Wayne's World 2," and "Dracula's Daughter" are all perfectly good sequels, but none of them continues a single story arc through both movies.  Ideally, with a perfect sequel, watching parts one and two back-to-back should feel like a single story split into two parts, even though it was not originally written with that intent.

Given this list of criteria, here are the movies that qualify as PERFECT MOVIE SEQUELS:

* Aliens

* Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey

* Bride of Frankenstein

* Frozen 2

* Hellraiser 2

* Rocky 2

* Terminator 2: Judgement Day

Conflicting Sexual Narratives

One of the many problems with our collective sexual psychology is that our society has told us all, from a very early age, three completely different narratives regarding the role of sex in our society.  These narratives overlap, but at the same time, totally contradict each other, almost as if we were simultaneously living in three different cultures acting independently of one another.

The first narrative is that all people are just expected to pair off into monogamous relationships, gay or straight, short-term or long-term, legally-binding or not, but always with a clearly defined beginning and ending of a relationship, and that a permanent commitment (i.e. marriage) is the mark of a "successful" relationship.  This is the narrative that the majority of people seem to live by, and the one most represented in books, movies and television.  It derives from classic medieval romance stories, but with a few minor alterations for the modern age.  While one-night-stands do exist in this narrative, they are always defined as "meaningless," and even regarded as "immature."  In this narrative, sex is almost a formality, as if having sex with a person is a way of certifying that, yes, this is a romantic relationship, as opposed to just two friends hanging out together.  Movies and television typically don't go into too much detail about how this type of sex is performed, as the focus is on the relationship aspect, but it is implied that there's a "magical" property to sex when it's with the right person, and that the act itself is relatively vanilla, with kinks and fetishes reserved for aforementioned "meaningless" sexual encounters.  In short, casual sex exists, but the ultimate goal is always long-term monogamy.

All three narratives have a sort of "shadow" narrative, that follows the same overall belief as the main narrative, but with a dark additional element.  In the case of the first narrative, the shadow is the stereotypical "nice guy" narrative, which implies that achieving the goal of long-term monogamy is a literal reward for having good character, with good character being defined mostly around adherence to the standards set by the narrative.  That is to say, the more quickly and completely one commits to a relationship, the more deserving one is of having one.  This can be used by some people to justify obsessive and even stalkerish behavior.  The logic goes something like, "If obsession is a sign of devotion, and devotion is a good thing, then obsession must be a good thing, and should be reciprocated."  This is obviously dangerous, because at best, it leads to arrogance and self-entitlement, and at worst, can lead to psychopathic behavior.

The second narrative is that sex is a cultural taboo, and taboos are made to be broken.  This is kind of a narrative nested inside a narrative.  The belief is that sex is good, but also the belief is that the belief is that sex is bad.  This is the narrative in which it's "fun to be naughty."  We see this in expressions like "bad boy" and "bad girl."  This is also where we find the foundation of things like BDSM, roleplay, and of course, porn.  Despite porn's obvious casual attitude to sex, there's almost always a paradoxical presumption that some external observer somewhere disapproves, hence all the "dirty little secrets" and "forbidden desires."  It's based entirely around the concept that sex is fun, not in spite of, but because of the fact that it's breaking rules.  Naturally, porn has very little to do with real life, but it does reflect a general attitude held by many people.  Fortunately, most people respect that there are rules within rules.  For example: sex with someone roleplaying as a minor is good, but sex with an actual minor is bad; watching a video about someone cheating on a partner is good, but actually cheating on a partner is bad; watching a video about or roleplaying as a boss using quid pro quo on an employee is good, but doing this in real life is bad; etc.  This leads to a few problems.  For one, a person might find sex boring unless there's some element of danger or of sinfulness about it, even if it's only pretend.  For another, a person may become desensitized to fake risks and fake taboos, and start seeking out the real thing in the form of rape, incest, pedophilia, etc.

While the extreme rule-breakers are certainly a dark aspect to the second narrative, they don't really count as the "shadow" of the narrative, but instead, just a more extreme form of the narrative.  The true shadow, is the person who does the complete opposite, by becoming prudish.  These are the people who agree that sex is naughty, and that naughty is fun, but would rather be rule-followers than rule-breakers.  For these people, religion can be a convenient excuse, but more often, it's a kind of indirect conformity.  The person becomes sexually reserved or repressed because a sexually-repressive society was implied by someone else for some unrelated reason.  It's similar to the well-observed effect that people tend to wear more drab colors in times of economic recession.  People who feel powerless want to gain approval from "society" and from "the system," and so they subconsciously self-repress, to show that they are "good" people.

The third narrative is that sex is a status symbol for men, and a mark of shame for women.  (This is the narrative in which LGBTQ+ becomes a complicating factor, and must be removed from consideration or labeled as "exempt" from following the script.)  Simply, men seek to acquire as much sex as possible from as many women as possible.  This allows them to report back to their peers, elevating their place in the social hierarchy.  Men who lie to brag are considered the lowest of the low, but only when caught.  Rapists, specifically those who attack women in dark alleys, are bad men, not because they violate autonomy, but because they are "cheating to win."  Women are classified basically like video game levels, with some women being "too easy" and others "too impossible."  Women should be just challenging enough, with more attractive women having a higher value, because of the opportunity to be more selective.  This is the narrative that gives us all the classic baseball expressions, "scoring," "striking out," "grass on the field," "going all the way," "switch-hitter," "pitching," "catching," and of course, all the "bases."  This narrative is a serious problem for women, because it bars them from enjoying sex without lowering their own value and status.  People often point out what a problem this is for men as well, because sex becomes an obligation wrought with psychological pressure instead of an enjoyable activity, as well as this being a symptom of the whole "toxic masculinity" culture.  Unlike the other two narratives, however, fewer people seem to actually subscribe to this thinking.  Those that do seem to have it as a sort of default setting, presumed to be the narrative of society.  To put it another way, if 100 men are in a room, and one of the men perceives women as trophies, while the other 99 disagree, the young observer may assume that the first man is typical of the entire room, while the rest are agreeing with him only in secret.  Thus, a minority opinion can still be perceived as a majority, and in this way, create more peer pressure for sensitive individuals.

The shadow of the third narrative is the complete rebellion against the narrative, taking the form of sex-negative feminism or some form of misandry, either from women directed at men, or from men directed at themselves.  This shadow narrative never quite took hold of the public consciousness the way the others have, but it does tend to crop up from time to time.

The one narrative that never seems to appear in the public consciousness is the idea of sex as a simple recreational activity, which is strange, because out of all of them, this is the most logical.  The problem is that the first three are so deeply rooted in the collective psyche, that most of us can only reach this point after years of unlearning the previous three.  All three narratives must be unlearned, as a person who accept the fault in one or two of them will likely default to the remaining one.  For example, a person who views sex as a form of conquest (the third narrative) might later have an awakening, realize the error of his ways, and embrace monogamy (the first narrative).  For another example, a person attempting to be monogamous (the first narrative) might later become bored or disillusioned with traditional relationships, and indulge in a kind of underground swinger lifestyle, fitting with the second narrative.  Alternatively, a person following one of the main narratives, after an unpleasant experience of some sort, might fall into the shadow version of that particular narrative.  Once in the shadow, breaking out requires unlearning the entire narrative.  For an example of this, a person who has a sex-negative attitude, seeing it as "dirty," probably isn't going to embrace the second narrative, enjoying breaking rules.  More likely, this person would have to erase the entire second narrative and embrace the first one or none at all.  Only a person who has examined and rejected all three can truly embrace the fourth, fully sex-positive narrative, because all three are so unavoidable.

Even the fourth "alternative" worldview has a shadow, albeit not nearly as damaging.  That shadow is the rare-but-vocal sexual liberation evangelist.  This person may hold the belief that casual non-monogamous sex is not only something that should be socially acceptable, but should be applied universally.  They may attempt to argue that a couple in a relationship is fundamentally wrong, having been brainwashed by society into going against their intrinsic non-monogamous nature.  Granted, these sorts of attitudes are not exactly dangerous, they can be extremely irritating, because they fail to consider that the monogamous, the faux-transgressive, or even the celibate, may have found a form of happiness that works for them.  To tell such people that their lifestyles are wrong or unnatural is no less disrespectful than trying to convince a person in a homosexual relationship to become exclusively heterosexual.

In conclusion, the sort of sexual or romantic lifestyle a person leads should be bespoke to the individual preferences, flexible enough to adapt to changing preferences, and never modeled after the expectations of perceived society.  There is no "right," except what is right for the individual, and there is no "wrong," except that which does physical or psychological harm to oneself or others.  These social narratives are simply fictions, not obligations or lifestyle blueprints.

Constitutional Proposal

We the people of the United States, in order to decentralize political powers of the federal government, to reduce wasteful federal spending, to strive for greater accountability of government, to present a more complete enumeration of rights, to improve economic stability, and to reduce involvement in foreign conflicts, do hereby repeal the Constitution of the United States as ratified in 1791, and do ordain and establish this replacement Constitution for the United States of America.

·                     ARTICLE I:  Federal legislative power shall be divided among a series of councils, and each federal council shall have authority over and only over those departments and agencies assigned to them.  Each state shall be free to choose its own method for appointing council members and be responsible for any salaries paid.  States shall be free to choose to appoint as few as zero or as many as three delegates to each council.  If at any time, a particular state has not appointed a representative to a particular council, where a decision affecting said state is imminent, that state's chief executive may act in person or by proxy as temporary council member.  No one person shall be permitted to serve on more than one council at the same time.  Each council shall be free to determine its own legislative process, unless herein stated otherwise.  Any council member found to be accepting bribes or emoluments shall be removed immediately and banned from holding a seat on any federal council for at least ten years.  Facilities and offices for council members shall not be extravagant.  No federal council shall pass any law which does not directly pertain to its own described purpose, and no federal department or agency shall attempt to enact or enforce laws which are not defined by the council to which it is subordinate.  Those states where offices of federal councils or departments subordinate to federal councils are located shall not attempt to use such positions to unfairly influence decisions of said councils or departments.

·                     THE FINANCIAL COUNCIL shall be responsible for collecting funds from the states, as needed, and as they are able to pay, and distributing those funds to the various federal programs, projects and departments as needed, as well as providing financial aid to those states in need, and overseeing all national social security and other national public welfare systems.

·                     This Council shall oversee the printing and banking of money and all other departments related to such.  No money shall be printed which is not backed by coin or bullion, or by some similar commodity.

·                     This Council shall not place conditions on any state, federal council, or subordinate federal department under threat of withholding funding.

·                     Each state shall be free to determine its own means of revenue with certain limitations.  No property taxes shall be applied to non-commercial land.  No income taxes shall be applied to salaries, wages, gifts, tips, or unemployment compensation.  No sales taxes shall be applied to food, medicine, or basic essentials.

·                     No direct federal taxes shall be applied to the people.

·                     All social security and other public welfare payments must be guaranteed by sufficient funds held in reserve, and no public welfare funds shall be borrowed from or borrowed against.

·                     The Financial Council shall have authority to legislate and enforce antitrust regulations, to cancel debts where necessary, and to regulate and insure banking and lending institutions to ensure honest and fair dealings.  This does not preclude states from passing additional regulations.

·                     THE CIVIL RIGHTS COUNCIL shall serve to protect the freedoms of all persons in the United States, whether they be permanent residents or foreign visitors, placing appropriate limitations on state powers where necessary, shall oversee those departments relating to fair treatment of workers and consumers, and shall oversee and maintain the federal court system.

·                     All public elections conducted in any state shall abide by certain rules, which shall be enforced where needed by the Civil Rights Council.  These rules are as follows.

·                     No state shall set its legal voting age higher than eighteen years.

·                     No poll taxes or registration fees shall be applied.

·                     Absentee ballots shall be made unconditionally available.

·                     No person shall be denied the right to vote on the basis of gender, ethnicity, religion, income, education or any other superficial criteria.

·                     Elections between three or more choices shall be conducted in a ranked-choice manner.

·                     No official in any one state shall be permitted to attempt to influence the outcome of any election held in a different state.

·                     The Council may pass additional rules to ensure fairness and transparency in elections, to regulate campaign financing and conduct, and to discourage organized attempts to influence elections across multiple states.  States shall be free to self-regulate election procedures where no existing federal rules apply.

·                     All legislatures, police, courts and prisons in any state shall abide the following limitations on power with regard to crime and punishment:

·                     No bills of attainder or ex post facto laws shall be passed.

·                     Persons shall be secure in their homes, persons, vehicles, papers, communication lines, data and effects against unwarranted searches, seizures, or surveillance, and no warrants shall be issued without probable cause, and particularly describing the places to be searched or surveyed, and the persons, data and things to be seized.

·                     No person accused of any serious crime shall be denied the right to a fair and speedy trial by an impartial jury of peers.  No person shall be denied the right to legal counsel.

·                     No person, except for officers of the law, shall be forced to give self-incriminating testimony.  No person shall be threatened or coerced into giving a confession.

·                     No officer of the law shall attempt to entrap a potential suspect by encouraging or participating in any criminal act.

·                     No acquitted person shall be prosecuted twice for the same offense.

·                     No convicted person shall be denied the right to appeal where reasonable justification for appeal exists.

·                     No excessive fines or bails shall be imposed.  No cruel or unusual punishments or inhumane prison conditions shall be inflicted.

·                     No person while incarcerated shall be employed in an exploitative manner.

·                     No person shall be forced to complete a sentence for having violated any law that has been repealed.

·                     No person upon having completed a sentence shall be denied the rights of any free person.

·                     No person holding any office shall be exempt from prosecution or enjoy lesser consequences for crimes as a benefit of holding any office.

·                     Any person employed by the court or by law enforcement who is proven to have falsified evidence or knowingly presented false evidence, in addition to any other penalties, shall be permanently removed from public service, and any salaries, benefits or pensions being received by said person shall be immediately discontinued.

·                     Judges shall not be required to impose sentences where unusual or extenuating circumstances give just cause for sentences to be waived.

·                     All persons shall have use of the court to settle any civil dispute in excess of one hundred dollars.

·                     All states shall abide the following limitations on power with regard to general rights:

·                     No law shall require adherence to or practice of any state religion, and no law shall prohibit the free exercise of religion.

·                     No law shall limit or censor the freedom of speech, the press, or artistic expression, except in cases of particularly harmful misinformation or in cases of infringement on privacy or copyright.

·                     No law shall infringe upon the right of the people peaceably to assemble.

·                     No law shall infringe upon the right of the people to petition the government for a redress of grievances.

·                     No law shall infringe upon the right of adults to keep such weapons which can be reasonably used for the purpose of self-defense, and no regulations on the licensed carry and use of such weapons shall be unfair or unreasonable.

·                     No land or other property shall be confiscated or commandeered from any person without proper cause or without fair compensation.

·                     No person shall be forced into labor except in cases of direct and proportional compensation for criminal damages.

·                     No law shall infringe upon the right of adults to marry or divorce in a manner of their own choosing.

·                     No law shall infringe upon the freedom of bodily autonomy, including but not limited to the right of informed and sound-minded adults to buy, sell or use intoxicating substances, to engage in for-profit sexual activities, to make end-of-life decisions, to terminate pregnancy, or to receive other elective medical procedures.

·                     Laws with respect to the sale of goods or services shall not be intended to create monopolies or to give unfair advantages to businesses with regard to free and fair market competition.

·                     No law shall restrict travel between states, united or foreign, except in cases of criminal investigations or in cases of medical quarantines.

·                     All persons of at least the age of eighteen years shall be considered as adults and having all the rights as such.  The extension of any rights and privileges to persons younger than eighteen years shall be left to the discretion of the states.

·                     No law shall infringe upon the rights of parents or guardians, while in their homes, to raise their children in a manner of their own choosing, except in cases of abuse or endangerment.

·                     States reserve the right to set residency requirements on civic participation, but no separate citizenship status shall be established or required.  No basic rights shall be denied to foreign visitors.

·                     No private companies or agencies shall be employed or coerced by government into violating any right described herein.

·                     All municipalities shall respect these same limitations on power with the exception of those voluntarily participating in privately owned and operated intentional communities.

·                     THE FOREIGN AFFAIRS COUNCIL shall be responsible for appointing ambassadors and overseeing embassies, approving treaties, and deciding terms of warfare.

·                     Each state shall be responsible for its own military readiness.  No central military shall be maintained.

·                     War shall only be declared by unanimous agreement by the Foreign Affairs Council, and such declarations shall particularly describe the purpose and goal of said war.  In time of war, the Council shall appoint a temporary Commander-in-Chief, who will have complete authority over all military divisions, within the terms of said declaration.

·                     States may deploy troops and equipment in support of foreign nations, if such nations request assistance, and only with approval from the Foreign Affairs Council.  In such cases, any such use of troops or equipment shall be directed by said foreign nation, and only within the limitations of military actions defined herein.  Approval from the Foreign Affairs Council is not required for states to supply foreign nations with food, medicine or other humanitarian aid.

·                     States shall not be prohibited from using military force in self-defense on home soil.

·                     No troops shall be quartered in any private house.  No person shall be forcibly conscripted.  No tour of duty, in time of peace, shall be extended without consent.  No resignations, in time of peace, shall be denied.

·                     No person, enlisted or civilian, shall be used without their knowledge and consent for medical or psychological experimentation.

·                     Testing of experimental weapons and other military devices shall be conducted in the safest manner possible and avoid unnecessary damage to surrounding environments.

·                     Nuclear and other weapons of mass destruction shall be used only by unanimous agreement of the Foreign Affairs Council, and only as a last resort.  The use of biological or chemical weapons, the use of permanent mines, the torture of prisoners of war, and the deliberate targeting of civilians are all strictly prohibited.

·                     Unwarranted espionage conducted upon foreign powers may not be conducted in time of peace, and no warrants shall be issued except by the Foreign Affairs Council, upon probable cause.

·                     THE SCIENCE COUNCIL shall be responsible for awarding research grants and for overseeing those federal departments dedicated to scientific advancement, to protection of natural resources through industrial and agricultural regulations, and to climate research and protection.

·                     THE HEALTH AND SAFETY COUNCIL shall be responsible for regulating the process of inspecting food and other products, both domestically produced and imported, for consumer safety, shall maintain regulations for safe working environments, and shall, where necessary, enact medical quarantines.

·                     THE TRANSPORTATION COUNCIL shall be responsible for maintaining interstate public transportation systems, safety regulations regarding air and space travel, and the postal service.

·                     THE RECORDS COUNCIL shall be responsible for keeping complete and accurate records of federal actions, laws, proposals, and general information for reference and for posterity, as well as maintaining national archives and museums, overseeing matters relating to patents and trademarks, overseeing the national census, and issuing national awards.

·                     All recorded information shall be freely available to the public, except for that of a highly personal nature or that regarding classified current military operations.  Military secrets shall be declassified in a timely manner once such secrecy can no longer be reasonably justified.

·                     Official public records shall not be removed or destroyed or knowingly placed in jeopardy of being lost, stolen or destroyed.

·                     THE SPECIAL PROJECTS COUNCIL shall be responsible for planning and overseeing all large-scale national improvement projects which do not fall under the authority of any other council or any state, and which require only temporary federal oversight.  This Council shall have authority to choose and employ private contractors and to work with state and municipal authorities as needed.  Completed projects shall be relinquished to the state, municipality or the private sector.

·                     Special projects shall be completed in a timely manner, as circumstances allow.  The purpose and goals of each project shall be decided either by the Council itself, or by an agreement by a majority of states.

·                     Any new technologies developed by the Special Projects Council, which are released to the private sector, shall be considered public domain and freely available.  Special projects shall not be misused to provide unfair assistance to profit-competitive businesses.

·                     This Council shall be responsible for any and all changes to federal holidays, national flags, symbols, anthems or the like, after having been met with approval by direct popular vote.  Such decisions shall not regard any establishment or endorsement of a particular religion or language.  Any lack of formal adoption of new holidays or symbols shall not be misconstrued as a basis for prohibition of spontaneous or local celebrations or adoptions of such holidays or symbols.

·                     ARTICLE II:  Each head of each department subordinate to any Federal Council shall have authority to make executive decisions in such cases where circumstances necessitate immediate action.  Each department shall have the option to veto decisions made by the appropriate council, having stated clear reasons for doing so, for a period of thirty days.  If said Council has not overturned or revised said decision within that time, then said decisions shall be considered final.

·                     Any department head may be removed from office by a decision by the appropriate council for acts of insubordination, for exceeding stated authority, or for other forms of misconduct or mismanagement of said department.

·                     In the event of a national crisis, the appropriate council may grant the head of the appropriate department, for a limited time, absolute authority to act in response to said crisis, including, where necessary, enlisting the support of other federal departments.  In cases where it is unclear under which federal department's or council's jurisdiction a particular crisis falls, and an agreement cannot be reached among the council members in a timely manner, an appropriate department head may be summarily chosen by the Chief Justice.

·                     All federal departments shall offer equal opportunity with regard to employment, salaries, or promotions.

·                     ARTICLE III:  The Federal Government as created under the United States Constitution of 1791, in order to provide sufficient time for the establishment of the new federal system and ensure a smooth transition of powers, shall continue to function as needed from the time of the adoption of this new Constitution until the scheduled conclusion of the first full presidential term following the ratification of this document.  The offices and holdings of the old federal system shall be disposed of as follows.

·                     The United States Senate, the House of Representatives, and the offices of President and Vice President of the United States, shall be utterly dissolved.

·                     The United States Supreme Court and all other Federal Courts shall continue under the supervision of the Civil Rights Council.  All future Supreme Court Justices shall be appointed by the Civil Rights Council.  The number of Supreme Court Justice positions shall be fixed at nine.  The Chief Justice shall be appointed by the Civil Rights Council, or if left vacant for thirty days, shall fall automatically to the most senior Supreme Court Justice.  No Justice shall be forcibly removed from office without having been given a formal hearing by the Civil Rights Council.  No prior ruling by the Supreme Court shall be overturned without just cause having been presented in writing to the Supreme Court by the Civil Rights Council.

·                     All branches of the United States Armed Forces shall be divided among the various states.  Military units shall serve under the direction of their respective state governments, except in time of war, during which time they shall operate under the direction of a temporary Commander-in-Chief to be appointed by the Foreign Affairs Council.  Troops shall not be deployed onto foreign soil without proper authorization from the Foreign Affairs Council, with the exception of the Peace Corps.  No state shall make war with any other state, and no state shall station its own troops within any other state without permission from said other state.

·                     All federal lands shall be relinquished thusly:  All national parks shall be recategorized as state parks under the direction of the respective states in which they are located.  All federal land registered as being reserved for use by Native American tribes shall be considered as the property of said tribes and considered independent states.  All self-governing integrated territories, including the District of Columbia, shall be considered as states.  All unincorporated island territories currently being held for the purpose of wildlife protection and preservation shall remain as such.  All claims to disputed territories shall be relinquished.  All other federally owned lands shall be relinquished to the states in which they are located.

·                     All other existing federal departments, agencies and commissions, shall be examined by the Special Projects Council to determine the best means of disposition, whether that be to place such departments under the direction of the appropriate Federal Council, to merge such departments with other departments, to divide such departments among the states, to relinquish such departments to the private sector, or to dissolve such departments entirely.

·                     All federal buildings which are no longer needed as a result of this reorganization, shall be given to their respective states to be sold at auction, demolished or repurposed as they see fit.

·                     All federal employees whose services are no longer required as a result of the dissolution of their respective departments, including private contractors, shall be given fair severance compensation.  Pensions for retired federal employees shall continue uninterrupted.

·                     All moneys still owed by the United States, including federal bonds, foreign debts, reparations, military pensions, and all other debts shall continue to be paid until paid in full.  No future federal bonds shall be issued, except in time of crisis.

·                     Any current laws which contradict this Constitution shall be considered null and void.  Any current federal laws which do not contradict this Constitution shall be presumed to be in effect until having been repealed or amended by the appropriate Council.

·                     ARTICLE IV:  Amendments and alterations to this Constitution, including the creation of additional councils, shall only be made by unanimous agreement of all states.  Creation of new departments or agencies subordinate to existing councils shall neither be redundant nor exceed the domain of such councils, and any effort to increase or decrease the number of subordinate departments may be prohibited by the Supreme Court on this basis.

·                     ARTICLE V:  Any state wishing to change its borders, divide into smaller states, combine with other states, change its system of government, or secede from the United States, shall not be prevented from doing so, provided that all parties directly involved in such decisions have reached an agreement, and that such decisions are approved by popular vote in the affected areas.  If any state secedes from the United States, all federal services in said state shall be discontinued, with the exception of any financial aid being received, which shall be evaluated and determined on a case-by-case basis.